Dinner with Sam!
by DarthFlores
Summary: Lincoln is dragged by Luna to dinner at Sam's house.


**Note I do not own the loud House, all rights go Nickelodeon and Viacom.**

Lincoln was at school, having lunch with Clyde.

"Are you ready for the season finale of ARGGH!" asked Clyde.

"You know it." said Lincoln. Lincoln then turned to the viewer. "Today me and Clyde will be watching the season finale of ARGGH! I hope it's awesome."

"You bet. My dad's are going out of town for the day, which leaves just us at your place for the event." said Clyde. "There is gonna be pizza, soda, and staying up late to tell spooky stories."

"This will be the best Friday night ever!" declared Lincoln.

 _Cut to Lincoln with Luna._

"This is the worst Friday night ever." said Lincoln.

As soon as Lincoln came home, Luna had forced him to go to dinner with Sam at his place. Lincoln didn't want to hang out with Luna's boyfriend, he wanted to hang out with Clyde.

"Why should I have dinner with your boy toy?" asked Lincoln

"Listen bro, the reason is-" started Luna

"Is this because I uploaded that embarrassing video?" asked Lincoln. "Because I already said I was sorry, and uploaded a video about me in return. So is this the reason why I should have dinner at your Boyfriend's house."

"Listen Linc," said Luna "this is the first time I'm meeting Sam's parents, I need you there for support. Please!"

"Fine but you owe me." said Lincoln.

"Don't worry Linky, I'll pay you back." said Luna.

When they got there, Luna knocked on the door and was greeted by a girl with blonde hair, with teal streak, with two piercings on each ear. She wore a blue leather jacket, with a white shirt with a 'The Who' logo on it, burgundy ripped jeans held by a black studded belt, and wore dark purple boots.

"Oh hi Luna!" exclaimed the girl as she hugged Luna, with Luna returning the hug.

"Is this Sam's sister?" Lincoln asked Luna.

"No, I don't even have a sister." said the girl. "Hi I'm Sam. Nice to meet you, Luna talks about you all the time, Linky." she then held out an arm for a handshake. Lincoln then looked at Luna, with confused eyes. "I guess Luna didn't tell you she was Bisexual, huh?"

"Sorry bro, but I was too nervous to tell anyone." said Luna. "I thought all of you would hate me."

"I more offended that you'd think I would hate you for having a girlfriend." said Lincoln. "But to lie, saying that Sam's your boyfriend, is just rude."

"Don't worry there little dude," said Sam. 'I told my parents the exact same thing. But they knew that Luna was a girl name so that lie only lasted for 10 minutes."

"Well, I hope your parents are excepting.' said Lincoln.

"They are." said Sam . 'When their not fighting.' Sam thought to herself. "Mom! we have guests!"

Sam's mom then came down stairs. She looked like Sam, but older, and dressed more motherly as opposed to Sam's rebellious look. But she still had that teal streak. She wore a purple plad shirt, with grey pants.

"You must be Luna," said the mother, she then shook Luna's hand. "I'm Helen, nice to meet you." Helen then looked at Lincoln. "Who are you?"

"I'm Luna's brother, Lincoln." said Lincoln.

"Well nice to meet. Sam told me about you, said that Luna would never stop talking about you." said Helen. "Come on in, you must be hungry."

"Yeah I'm starving." said Lincoln.

Lincoln and Luna then went inside. Immediately, Lincoln recognized how messy it was, even messier than his house. Plus it smelled bad too. 'How do they live in this filth, it smells like someone died in here.' Lincoln thought to himself.

"Hey little guys, do you mind taking off your shoes?" asked Sam, as she took off her boots.

'A no shoes house. The plot thickens.' Lincoln thought to himself, as he and Luna took of their shoes.

"My son, Jessie is with his friends at Gus' Games n' Grub, so your more than welcome to have his seat, Lincoln." said Helen.

"Lucky, I love that chair." said Sam.

'Jessie is lucky to be with his friends while I'm stuck here.' thought Lincoln.

As they made it to the dinning room Lincoln saw an old mad, which looked to be like Sam's grandpa, sitting at the opposite end of the table.

"This is my grandpa, Josh." said Sam.

"Wuttup gramps?" said Luna.

"Hello there, I'm Joss." said Joss as he shook Luna's hand. "Are you gonna treat my Sam right?" He said with a serious face.

"Yes." Luna said weakly.

"Alright then welcome to the family." said Joss with a smile.

Sam then pet her dog and took a seat next to the head of the table, with Luna sitting next to her. Lincoln then sat at head of the table.

"Oh, that's Sam's father's chair." said Helen.

"I'm sorry, I thought this was Jessie's chair." said Lincoln.

"No it's fine, sit, sit." said the father. He had black hair, brown eyes, wore wearing v neck sweater, black pants, and black socks."Your the guest, you sit where you like."

"Umm... okay." stuttered Lincoln.

Lincoln then saw Sam's father sitting on the floor.

"Hey Linky." called the father. "It is Linky isn't it?"

"My name is Lincoln actually." said Lincoln.

"Could you do me a favor and pass the dog food, since I'm a doggy who sits on the floor now." said the father, petting Sam's dog.

"Harry, he didn't know." said Helen.

"He could've figured it out Helen." snapped Harry, "For heavens sakes, don't defend this stranger."

"Do not... raise your voice at me!" snapped Helen. "Like I'm one of your other women."

"That was fourteen years ago!" exclaimed Harry.

Soon both Harry and Helen began to argue.

'Try not to make eye contact. Just look at your phone and pretend to text.' Thought Lincoln. 'Maybe Sam can help me out.' But Sam just broke down crying.

"Look. let's just try to have a nice meal for once." said Helen, as Harry took a seat next to Luna, sitting opposite Helen. "Harry, if you could lead us in grace."

'Oh no, not this. I've only seen this on T.V., but not real life.' thought Lincoln. he then looked to his left and saw the T.V. next to him. 'No way! Their a T.V. at dinner, milk at dinner, no shoes family? What are the odds.'

"Lincoln!" called Harry, getting Lincoln's attention. "Would you like to finish the prayer for us?"

"Um sure... god save the queen all dressed in green." Lincoln sung. 'I think that worked!'

Sam gave Lincoln an odd look, but Helen then said "Dig in!"

Lincoln then looked at his dinner plate, Chicken, lettuce, and a potato, that wasn't even cooked. 'Great, El Pollo!' thought Lincoln. He then took a bite of the chicken only to start gagging. 'Uh, this tastes like a butt's foot, gotta spit it out, but how?' Lincoln then got up and said "I gotta take poop!"

Everyone then gave Lincoln an odd look. 'Poor choice of words.'

Lincoln then walked over to the bathroom. 'Super Awkward! Just find the bathroom. I feel like bathrooms are always two doors to the left.'

Lincoln then opened the second door to the left and saw the bathroom. He then closed the door, went to the toilet, and spit the chicken out.

"Good bye chicken." said Lincoln. He then noticed that the toilet had a soft cover. "I am needed on the buttocks, but I don't gotta go. Maybe later at home." Lincoln then turned to the viewer. "As you can see, my Friday night isn't as good as I hoped it could be. An entire afternoon gone, wasted at Luna's girlfriend's house. This is so unfair, why is it that my sisters have the right to force me to their events, but I can't do anything I want, I hate this. Well better." Lincoln then flushed the toilet and walked to the door only to remember him not washing his hands. "Do I have to wash my hands? i mean I didn't actually poop, so what's the point? I'll just run the water so that if anyone's listening, it sounds Like I washed them." Lincoln then turned on the sink for a second, but then remembered how stupid that was and turned it off. "Why do I even do that, what are the chances that anybody's listening."

Lincoln then opened the door only to see Sam's grandpa outside. "Just making sure."

'Let's just get this over with.' thought Lincoln, as he went to the table, only to see Sam's parents fighting again,

"Your the one that brings home the trash!" stated Helen.

'Well, I've never been this homesick in my entire life.' thought Lincoln.

"Woof, woof, woof, the idiot dog!" said Harry, walking like a dog up to Helen. "The idiot that makes ALL THE MONEY AROUND HERE!"

"YOU KNOW I'M LOOKING FOR WORK!" exclaimed Helen.

Lincoln then went over to Luna and Sam "Hey Luna, maybe's it's time get out of here, it's getting kinda late around here-"

But Sam was once again crying

"Dang it!" said Lincoln.

 _Later at the Loud House._

Lincoln is sitting with Clyde and Sam eating pizza, while watching Arrgh!

"So, were all these faked?" asked Sam.

"I don't know what's real anymore." said Clyde.

Luna was paying the pizza guy.

"Here twenty dollars, now go away." said Luna. Luna then went over to Lincoln. "Well, I payed for your guys' pizza, I hope that makes it up to you."

"Thanks Luna, but next time you have an event with Sam, just drag Lynn." said Lincoln.

"Will do bro." said Luna as she sat down next to Sam

"So why is this show more popular then the other ghost hunting show?" asked Sam.

"I have no idea." said Lincoln

 **The end!**

 **And that is a wrap! i hope you liked it. I know I did. Please leave a review.**


End file.
